Where do I go from here?

Time keeps on moving by and all I can do is sit and watch or duck and not even pay attention as it passes. I've abandoned my attempts to write while being taken in by my new Facebook page. There's been a distinct drop off in posts since I joined. It's fun and I like catching up to old acquaintences but it becomes addicting and has also kept me from following my true passions.

I have to find a way to get to that New Path I'm seeking. Days I wonder if I have it in me, others I know that writing is the way for me to get onto that path, and away from the one that is obviously wrong for me. Sort of hard to do in middle age, but sometimes you are reborn, or better yet, your true self comes out after you've had to fight your way down the wrong path.

I love writing about politics, as is shown in my previous works here. Lately it has been too depressing for me to follow and I don't want it to bring me down. Life in general has been tough and has taken it's toll on me, which has affected my ability to change paths. I can always come up with reasons not to, yet I love to write. I wish so much that writing was the path I started on because that is truly where my interests lie. I learn all about the technical world that I work in and become quite proficient, but not very fulfilled, which later leads to unhappiness which is where my trail has led me to.

There's a story about our trip to California that I took as a kid here on my blog, never finished. Seems to be the story of my life; I start something but get destracted or lose interest and never finish. I need to find the drive and energy to get me there instead of parking my ass on the couch and channel surfing or updating Facebook. Some way to make it happen.

Joseph Campbell is/was so right when you seek your bliss. When you find it, it no longer becomes work but your life and everything flows. In technical terms, you get maximum power from source to load with your impedence (resistance) matches. I hate work, it gives me too much stress and little to no satisfaction. It does help pay my way, but being on the corporate payroll knowing that the company could be sold and my job gone, espeically in these tough economic times. Having control over my path, instead of being led down one is where I will find my bliss. How to write and make a living when I've never done anything of the like before is rather daunting. But I am weary of the stress and anxiety that comes with being on the wrong path. It's a constant fight and struggle for your livelihood. A double edged sword, I can totally live without my job for the rest of my life, yet I can't because of the committments I have made. It's more than just me.

So, where do I go from here? What do I write about? Along with writing I really enjoy making people laugh and feel my sense of humor is another area of bliss to seek out. Life is hard, having a laugh makes it easier to get through. I am so thankful that I can provide for my family and that we do have a warm, safe place to sleep and get away from the masses where we are fed and find ourselves again.

How do I do these things, to follow my bliss and keep my life in order? Can I make the change or am I predestined to stay on this unhappy trail? It starts with changing who I am, finding the strength and courage to do it, and the stamina to take it the distance.

This post isn't really for anybody but myself. Are you on your right path, or is the path leading you elsewhere? Have you ever considered that you are actually on one in the first place? Those are the questions I would ask of you. I ask them of me all the time. But action is what's needed. All the talking in the world won't get there.

I plan on sticking to my strengths and will continue with politcal commentary as well as the comedy that life can be. Politics are wide and varied, beliefs are common yet many unalike. I feel I must speak on behalf of my country when I see fellow citizens misapplying it's intended purpose and meaning. Distorting our past and how we got here.

Maybe there's some stand up comedy in me, I need to know that. To do so, I must overcome internal fears of who I am and that rejection is a distinct possiblity but know that it's okay if you feel you are doing your best.

All I know is, that I cannot continue down this current path. I see no future, as if it drops right off a cliff. There is a path within sight, but it's rough and not very clear. It's gonna take work.

Dear God, please give me strength to make it so.

Bill